LOVE covers a multitude of sins, and while this quote is attributed to both Shakespeare and Louisa May Alcott, the sentiment is the same. We allow so much damage due to the thought, decision, action called love. We allow some to lie to us, hurt us and yes even take advantage of us while we are busily working on loving them.
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
― John Lennon
But the lesson this year for me was first to learn to love myself. Not waiting until I do everything right, until I have everything perfect or by physical self is in perfect order to decide to love me. Love of self used to get a bad wrap, we were told we were self centered when we set about to love ourselves...and this is entirely untrue. When we understand that self love makes all other love possible, probable and perfect, it is a most unselfish act. Because in loving ourselves we begin to be more present, available and on time with others.
“we accept the love we think we deserve.”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Most of my adult life has been about finding love and hanging onto it for dear life. This habit not only doesn't serve well, it sets one up for the most horrible damage at the hand of loved ones. We become a chaser and therefore they move the other direction. This year learning to allow those who do not know how to love be apart from my day to day world has allowed room for those who are better at it. They not only have stepped up to the challenge of caring about me, but have taught me how to love myself and others to a better degree. It's a bit like graduating to grownup.
“This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And babve, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up becuase if you give up, you'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.”
― Marilyn Monroe
There are no words to improve this quote, just knowing that I have Lady friends who do not suck, makes this lesson a perfect grade A+.
“Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.”
― Mother Teresa
I gift a smile to those who cross into my day, and I give love freely whether I get it back or not.
Lessons learned are a step up to love.
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