So there is this tv show that I hardly ever watch...well never intentionally watch. I don't know anyone who really likes it or watches and the host is well just annoying. I have been told by a few people that he is funny---but of the half dozen or so times that I on the off chance saw a part of his show...I never laughed--- not once. He does the most bizarre stunts and skits that dont even come close to bringing a smile...and actually I have thought, why would anyone find him humerous?
Sometimes when I am out with my gang...people actually come up and introduce themselves to one or more of us because we are having a good time...and they always end up saying something like, I wanna be freinds with you all, you are so funny. The things these girls come up with make me laugh till my sides hurt, im crying or one or more of us is snorting...and Im always keeping score of that by the way.
We often have fun where I work, and some of the stories and retellings of real life experiences can get us all rolling on the floor LOL or even LOAO. But this guy-this I cant figure out if he is a d-lister or just incredibly assanine and thats the public attraction, he makes fun of people, situations, other celebs...everyone is a target---but again I add HE IS NOT FUNNY!
So someone who happened to be in the same tv zone as I had this show on...and one of the monologues of the day was about FACEBOOK. He made comments like how can anyone have that many friends...how can they really know that many people? When he himself makes his living from people who DONT REALLY KNOW HIM...see the irony?
Here is someone who hopes that you will find him amusing, and listen to the commercials that pay his salary and find him somehow the person you want to write a check on your bank account of minutes at least five days a week....but none of us know him. Does that some how make him less relevant? Does it devalue his remarks and humor in my life? Do any of the people that are VIEWING his show and then maybe telling their friends about the stupid stuff he talked about the night before ever wake up one day and say---HEY I dont really know him so Im not gonna watch him anymore? And lets just be clear, I am sure somewhere there is an agent, or pr person running social networking page of somekind for this person. A website that thrives on people who dont really know who, but click to read his crap anyway.
So if his theory is correct, there is some value in a life that excludes anyone we have not had the opportunity to GET TO KNOW---um lets just get this said...everyone is someone you dont know until you take the time and effort to learn about them. What they like, what they find funny, or those things that mean the most to them.
So this yet to be named HOST on this one chance evening just goes on and on about FACEBOOK and those of us who as he put it are friend collectors...and how none of us CAN realistically have more than 50 friends and he was declaring a NATIONAL UNFRIEND DAY---November 17 to be exact. Now this guy that none of us know was now declaring that we should all be the lambs of the day and follow his lead and unfriend anyone we wouldnt loan $50 bucks to or one of the other stupid reasons he felt we should delete them from our wall.
At first I was a little upset---because clearly each of those who has become a part of my facebook friends at one time or another many have been ones to encourage me, either directly or through their own personal posts. They have been the humor in an otherwise difficult day. Sharers of good, bad or sad news. They have been my link to history, events and even something I didnt even know about if it not for their sharing. They have added to my social calendar inviting me to many worthwhile expereiences and happenings. They have been a part of my life and I would miss it if it were gone.
I was not one of the get with the program fast facebookers...I had to be coaxed and proded to even use it. But now I cannot imagine my life without it. I can hear from my relatives that I rarely get to see, catch up with news from school friends who only used to know but am learning about again.
I am sure many of you feel like I do that there is value in this social networking or there would not be so many of us who are using it daily, hourly or even constantly.
By the way I did not unfriend anyone on national unfriend day---and as far as I know, I only lost one of my friends...whether it was tied to this rediculous stunt or not I have no way of knowing, nor do I really care. I have come to believe that most people have something of value they bring to my life or they wouldnt be here. In my facebook life I have only unfriended a few. But the reasons were not because I didnt know them. It was because the knowing them had become something that made me sad. I was reminded almost everyday that their role in my life had not been very healthy. I still care about the few that I removed from daily contact...but I still see that it was the best decision for me. Mostly because shortly after I debated about taking the action and then when I finally managed to get it done, facebook added an app that would let you see who deleted you. And well then all the reasons I had taken the new boundary step was verified in the reactions of some who were deleted. I did not do it in anger or revenge or even as a stunt. It had just become too difficult to see their negativity and feel the sharpness of those things that were directed at me. The most bizarre aspect of those who were the polar negative to my otherwise positive life, were using things I said and shared as arrows to shoot back at me. Calling my need for facebook the attention getting ploy, drama central, or a replacement for those who were being removed. I also found that some people no matter how much you care about them or just happy being miserable...and they usualy are also those who turn their back on you and quietly give you the next trip under the bus racing down your street. They are not happy people and they can barely stand it when someone else is happy. They will also find ways to hurt you in their exit---but then we almost always know that is coming too.
But through some of those who have come to give me gifts of understanding, I learned that my life is mine to make of it what I will. I get to decide what, who, where---I get to choose happy over sad, yes over no, when and how. I get to be the director of my life movie choosing to spend my minutes in the show that makes me feel like me. I had to come to understand that those who find resentment in my decisions will just have to carry it around. I send them away with love and light. I choose peace instead of the fight. I choose to let them feel about me however they choose and to not see each situation or disagreement at the ticket to the next war of the words. I can be right for me without having to prove to you I am right or that you are wrong. My decisions are always right for me. Your acceptance of this life path is optional...welcome but not required. I was also accused of some other unsavory crimes because I had moved past the relationships that had turned in an opposite direction of where I was headed. I did find others who wanted to share this crazy life with me, others whose acceptance of who I am and where I am at and who have added a level of comfort I have not know for years. Those friends who have come into my life over the last couple of years have made my life. They have loved me unconditionally most of the time, respect me enough to disagree and keep me balanced when my drama queen tries to take over.
It is hard to say that I am boycotting this host or his show, because I never really watched it before. I also understand that anything you stand up and fight you give your energy to IT. And I simpoly will not ever give my spark to anything as rediculous as this show, that host or his national unfriend day. As a matter of fact, I am going to make it my mission to meet as many people as I can in this life...and take a little of their smile, joy and fun with me where ever I go. Because those pieces are not heavy. They are like the helium filled balloons that used to make me smile so much as a child, and the more I take...the lighter my steps will become
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